The 5 Stages of Sleep Loss

The story goes like this: You go through the nightly sleep ritual with your baby: putting their sleeper on, reading a story, brushing your baby's teeth, nursing or rocking or whatever your nightly ritual is. You lay your sleepy angel down in their crib to let them fall asleep. Their sweet little yawns and closed eyes give you hope, but alas, it is false hope because they don't go to sleep. Instead their bright eyes pop open and they choose this time to practice their new skill of sitting up/standing/crawling. Or maybe they are sick and need extra cuddles. Or maybe they are just not sleepy at the moment. I don't know where you are but if this story sounds familiar you will understand (and hopefully get a laugh out of) what I'm about to write. You have lost something very precious to you...your sleep. I don't know about you but I love my sleep and grieve its loss. So here are the stages us moms go through.

The 5 Stages of Sleep Loss:

1. Denial:  She was asleep! How did this happen? Did I really hear her cry? Maybe she was just whimpering in her sleep. Or maybe she will just lay herself back down in a minute and go to sleep. She isn't going to do this again tonight, she is too tired. It can't be my turn to go in and check on her...can it? I lay in my warm bed hoping that the crying will stop and she will go back to sleep.

But once you realize that they really are awake(or staying awake) and not going to put themselves back to sleep you enter stage 2:

2. Anger: You are angry at your husband for getting to stay in bed this time, angry that the floor is so cold, angry at your dog for snoring while being curled up in a warm ball on the couch, and angry at yourself for not doing a better job sleep training. Or at least this is my experience. (I hope I'm not the only mom that wonders if she has failed as a mother because her child doesn't sleep well!)

3. Bargaining: You bargain with your husband. Will you please go get our child? I will get up with her in the morning and let you sleep in? You bargain with your child (even if they can't understand you) If I rock you for 5 more minutes will you go back to sleep? You pray to God that He will help you get this beautiful baby He created to go to sleep. You become desperate. You will do anything if you can just get your child to go to sleep.

4. Depression: I don't know that I would call it being depressed, but at some point in all of this I definitely feel defeated. Especially if you are going on months of not getting a full nights sleep. Maybe you do feel depressed because you are so tired. All I know is I am worn out and sometimes feel like this will never end and that I will never have a good sleeper.

5. Acceptance: You have arrived. This is definitely the best place to be. You accept that you are up with them and you do whatever you need to do to comfort your precious baby and get them back to sleep. You realize that this is only for a short amount of time (it can't go on forever...right???) Your sweet baby will only be this small once and that this sickness or sleep regression or needing to eat during the night will eventually get better. You will help/comfort your child tonight because you are their mommy and that is what mommies do.

Maybe you move through these stages every night or maybe you have slowly been moving through them over the past months. Just know you are not alone. Your baby isn't the only one having trouble sleeping and you are not the only one exhausted. And your baby not sleeping well definitely does not mean you are a terrible parent. Get yourself a cup of something caffeinated and hang in there mama, you can do this!

Holiday Pork Loin

Today I am sharing a new recipe that I tried out. I call it Holiday Pork Loin because it reminds me of Thanksgiving and Christmas with the onion mix and cranberry, but the website I found it on just calls it "Cranberry Onion Pork Loin". Best of all, it is SUPER easy. I mean like 3 ingredients in a crock pot easy. I always serve it with roasted sweet potatoes and it is one of our new favorites. The recipe is found here.

Ingredients:
-Pork Loin
-1 packet of onion soup mix
-1 can of cranberry sauce(whole berry kind)

Put pork loin in crock pot. Sprinkle onion mix on top. Spoon cranberry sauce over the loin and onion mix. And 1/8 to 1/4 cup of water. Cook on low for 6 to 8 hours and voila!

Give it a try and let me know what you think!

Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is only a few days away. Many times people, myself included, do not take the time to stop and think of the things they are thankful for. I read a devotion the other day (here) that challenged it's readers to make a list of the things they are thankful for because we can get caught up in the daily "grind" and not realize how blessed we really are. So here you go (they are not in any particular order):

I'm thankful for my daughter sitting beside me. She is healthy, happy, and growing and for that I am extremely thankful. I'm thankful for every laugh and even the times she cries. I'm thankful that she made me and David parents. Being a mom is 10 times more difficult than I ever thought it would be, but I also never knew the joy or love I would feel as a parent.

I'm thankful for the dirty dishes downstairs in the sink and for the meal that was on them.

I'm thankful for my husband, who has seen me at my best and my worst, and still loves me. I'm thankful he is such a wonderful provider for our family and that he loves to help take care of our daughter. I'm thankful that he knows that being a mom is hard work and stressful and worrisome. I'm thankful he is there to help me, tell me to relax and have more faith that God will take care of it all.

I'm thankful for friends who understand that I will have my baby with me and still invite me out to lunch or offer to come over to my house just to spend time with me. I'm also thankful for friends who understand I might need a night out and invite me to go out with the girls or go to the movies.

I'm thankful for the wonderful family that I have. They are always willing to help and I have loved seeing them become grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. I'm thankful for them supporting me as a parent even when my choices are not the ones they would have made.

I'm thankful for the dog hair and slobber on my couch (even though some days it makes me mad) and for the dog who causes that hair and slobber. She is such a good dog (most of the time at least) and has adjusted so well to having a new little person in the house

I'm thankful for the pile of laundry that is awaiting me because I have clothes to wear and a washing machine to wash them in. I'm also thankful for the dryer.

I'm thankful for a roof over my head and a bed to lay down in.

I'm thankful that my parents raised me to love God. I'm thankful for all of the memories I have with my parents and my sister and brother.

I'm thankful for my small group and the years we have been together. I'm thankful for their listening ears and for challenging me to be a better person and to dig deeper into God's Word.

I'm thankful for family who aren't really family, but people who I consider family. The ones who you forget that you are not blood related to because they have become such an important part of your life.

I'm thankful for the hard moments I have experienced. The ones that I never thought I would get over or through but that with God's help I did overcome and have grown so much in the process.

I'm thankful for those moments that I did not follow my mommy instinct and then hated myself after. I'm thankful that it has taught me that God really has given me everything I need to be the parent Emery needs even when I feel like I'm not enough.

I'm thankful for chocolate and sweet tea.

I'm thankful for a husband who lets me sleep the extra half hour and gets up early with the baby.

Most of all, I'm thankful for my salvation. I'm thankful that God would take His precious child and sacrifice Him for me so that I can spend eternity with Him. I'm thankful He is my Savior, my Comforter, my Father, and my God.


So there is my list. I'm sure there are MANY more things that I am forgetting, but those are the ones I have thought of today. If anyone is reading this, I hope that you take time at some point in this week to think of the things you are thankful for as well. Happy Thanksgiving!

*photo credit goes to Jennifer Wood (thank you for the wonderful pictures!)

Fall is here

I love fall! Especially the few days of perfect weather we get here in TN before it turns wet and cold for the winter. Today is one of those nice fall days. A little cold for my liking, but sunny and beautiful. So for my small group tonight I decided to try the 2 ingredient pumpkin cupcakes. The recipe is for a cake, but I just cut the cooking time down to 20 minutes and kept a close eye on them.  I HAD to sample one to make sure they tasted ok...they are delicious! And so easy to make. 

No eggs, no oil, no water....just a package of spice cake mix and a can of pumpkin (not pumpkin pie). The only problem I ran into is that the batter is incredibly thick so unlike a normal cupcake it did not settle into a pretty rounded top and, since it is so thick, it only made about 16 cupcakes. Next time I think I will just take a spoon and smooth the tops down so that I don't have lumpy tops. Luckily, the cream cheese frosting easily covers it up :-) Enjoy! 

Sensory Board

While browsing the endless world of Pinterest I saw many ideas for sensory boards. E is at the age that I thought she would enjoy one so I enlisted the help of my Uncle Mickey (who is always so helpful and full of great ideas when it comes to this kind of stuff) to get it done. It was a trial and error process, but it is finished and E loves it! A sensory board is a fun way to help stimulate your baby's senses and expose them to different textures. My uncle just so happens to be in the flooring business so I used lots of different flooring samples, but you could just as easily use different types of fabrics or items around your house. Here is how I made my board:

First I got all of my materials and laid them out on a piece of particle wood board. I then had my handy husband cut the piece down to the size I needed. The pieces my uncle gave me were carpet, tile, and laminate samples, some cork board type material, and some sort of bubble flooring that I am guessing is for industrial use.

Next I covered the back and sides with a think felt fabric that I got at JoAnn's (using their mobile coupon I got it for half price). This I stapled in place with a staple gun. 

Then using a think flooring glue I attached all the pieces and let it dry. The only thing I would be careful of if you are going to make one is to make sure that all of the pieces are large enough that IF something did become detached it wouldn't be a choking hazard. Even with the strongest of glues you never know if a determined child could get a piece off. They are strangely very strong even at a young age! 

E loves playing with the board and I enjoyed making it! I have also seen where someone attached the board to their wall. I think that is a good idea, but I didn't have the wall space and I like that I can move it around to different rooms if I need to. 

Fighting the Good

My precious baby girl, who is for the most part a happy, laughing, good-natured baby, suddenly will becoming a fighting, screaming mess at naps. Not everyday (thank goodness!) but at least a couple times a week. I don't know why, but I am guessing it has something to do with being 6 months old and not wanting to miss out on what is going on. I try to make it as easy as possible on her. Fed, clean diaper, noise maker, soft blanket etc...and even though I KNOW a nap is what is best for her and what she needs she fights it. It is truly amazing what babies will do to fight a nap. I'm talking pulling hair and ears, trying to stay sitting up, talking to herself, grabbing her feet...you get the idea. Then after all of that she finally falls into a peaceful sleep and wakes up her smiling, happy self.

Today while this was all going on and I was praying on what to do (because sometimes I am just so lost at this parenting thing all I can do is kneel down and pray) it hit me that this is exactly how God must feel with me. He KNOWS what is best for me but I don't always want to do it. I want it my way. I fight it with all I have. How frustrating it must be for God. How silly He must think I am for trying to go against all the good He has for me. Yet, just as I love my daughter no matter, He still loves me and wants what is best for me. He "knows the plans he has for me, plans to prosper me and not to harm me". I just need to stop fighting His will and succumb to His plan because ultimately He knows what is best.

Never Forget

Never Forget
I will never forget that I was homeschooled working on my history when my dad called me into the living room.
I will never forget seeing the twin towers, one with a trail of smoke coming out.
I will never forget my dad explaining to me what the twin towers were.
I will never forget the confusion of what was going on or the grave realization after.
I will never forget watching the second plane hit.
Or the smoke and fire after.
I will never forget the fear and sadness.
I will never forget seeing what I thought was all debris falling only to later learn some of it was people jumping.
I will never forget my dad telling me and my sister sitting beside me that we are watching history happen or the sadness in his voice.
I will never forget the brave first responders risking and giving their lives to help save others.
I will never forget watching live as the towers crumbled and the darkness that filled the streets from all the dust and debri and smoke.
I will never forget the Pentagon..or how I wondered how many more hits there would be.
I will never forget flight 93 and the brave people who gave their lives to save many more.
Or the words 'Let's Roll'.
I had never sat and watched the news much before but I will never forget watching it for hours that day and the days that followed.
I will never forget the rescue efforts, or clean up, or memorials.
I will never forget the cross made from debris
I will never forget the stories of the individuals I heard.
I will never forget the war that followed and the many soldiers that served and gave their lives protecting our freedom.
I could never,        can never       and will       NEVER FORGET.